Why I gave up praying… for Lent: Never say, “I’ll pray for you” again.

You may have said it yourself before. I know I have. I even said it once or twice today. The problem is, just saying, “I’ll pray for you,” isn’t the same as praying.It can be hard though. You run into a friend at the store or in school. It’s someone you haven’t seen in a while. The conversation starts out boring—talking about the weather or what you’re shopping for. Then it takes a turn and you’re learning about this person’s health condition, family struggle, or latest sin issue.It may be hard to hear, or it may just be awkward. And then you realize you’re running late for something. How do I end this? It’s such a sad story. “Alright then, it was good seeing you,” and then the phrase that makes you a liar, “I’ll be praying for you.”

Bam. You said it. And then you walk away. And most of the time… you never pray for them. Not even once.

The phrase has become all too common. Like bless you after a sneeze, or praise God when you’re relieved about the car repair bill.

So, let me propose three alternatives:

1. Just say, “I’ll see you later.” It takes the pressure off. Now you’re not obligated to do anything. Honestly, sometimes this is just the right thing to say.
2. Say, “I’ll be praying for you,” and then do it. I’m going to recommend that if you go this route, you should make a note of what to pray for, set a recurring alarm in your phone titled ‘pray for _____”, and then consistently pray for that need for two weeks. It’s good practice, and then the next time you run into them in the store you can ask them how it’s going, and really mean it.
3. Pray for them right there. This can be scary for some, but be serious, when was the last time someone offered to pray for you anywhere and you turned them down? I believe this can be just as powerful as two weeks of praying for a person who doesn’t really know it’s happening. Right there in the pasta aisle, ask, “Would it be alright with you if I prayed for that right now?” Immediately after they nod or say yes, put your hand on their shoulder and pray in two sentences, “God, I lift up to you my friend _____, and her need for ______. Show her your love for her in this difficult time. In Jesus’ name, Amen.” Then, say, “I’ll see you later.” If you accidentally follow it up with, “I’ll be praying for you,” see number 2 above.

What would you say if someone asked if they could pray for you in the grocery store?